Sunday, August 20th 1995
Let me start with yesterday. I slept in until 9:30. I hung around until and then I babysat until 1 a.m. It was only supposed to be until 11, but they missed the party bus back to Clearwater. I had fun I guess. I made $30. I needed money to pay off my Spanish translator* and Reba CD. I went to church, talked to Mari and rearranaged my room. Katie, a girl in my youth group, mother died of stomach cancer. No one knew about it. Did I mention that when Jon called he said I was the nicest person he’d met in a long time? He also remembered I love yellow roses. He said he missed me. I’m so nervous about starting high school it is not funny. At least Mari is in typing with me and Sarah G will be in my English and Critical Thinking skills and Geometry classes witbh me. They’re my friends. I hope I meet and make new friends. I also hope Ryan is there. I don’t like him but he’s cool n-all. I need friends. I saw Eric M and Jeremy D at the parent orientation. I didn’t see Aaron there, I wonder if he still lives here. I doubt if any of those guys will wanna be friends with me. Who knows?
I already have everything planned out: my clothes, beauty supplies, and school stuff. I have swimming directly after school. Krissie B will take me to it and then to church afterwards. I bet I won’t have a social life whatsoever. I don’t want to go to school. High school scares me. I’m very afraid. I hope my guardian angel will be with me. I hate swimming. It’s not my sport but oh well. We rearranged my room. It’s nice I guess. I can’t wait until Jon writes me back.
I just talked to Mari (via a phone). We planned where we were going to meet and all that good stuff. There is a 7-11 in my high school. We have Coke machines in every hall. It is cool, but I’m nervous!!
Friday, August 18th, 1995
Last night’s entry was weird. For some reason I had to write that. Now I’m happy. I called Mari and we talked for 45 minutes. Then Jon called. Yes, my Jon of Raliegh, North Carolina called me. We talked for one hour and 20 minutes! I can’t believe he called. We talked about sports and school, friends, and everything else. He wrestles and makes pretty good grades. I love his voice! I am still in shock that he called! Thank God! I asked him why he hasn’t written and he said he had been at camp (they went rock climbing) and he had a picture taken in is waiting to have them developed but he remembered me. He remembered I love yellow roses. I’m going to give him a nickname when I think of one. He said I was the nicest person he’d met in awhile. He said he missed me. We talked about music. He likes Live, Green Day. I told him about Allison Krauss and our song being nominated for CMA awards.
I had swim team practice today. We were timed in the 100 and two 500’s. I was the slowest out of everyone. I felt bad. Swimming isn’t my sport. Maybe softball is. Who knows? Guess what? David Justice hit his 17th homerun tonight. I was so happy. My sister babysat Josh today while I was at swimming. I babysit him tomorrow from 2-11. Last night I had another Largo orientation. It was BORING!
August 17th, 1995
I am so upset I could cry! It’s been 2 weeks and I haven’t gotten a response from Jon. Ashley wrote me on Tuesday and Val wrote me today. I babysat at the church nursery Tuesday night from 6:30-8:30. Gabrielle, Cody and Sidney were there. I had fun. I have 67 volunteer hours. Swimming has been fun. I missed it on Monday because I had a Largo High Orientation. That was fun. I saw Mari and met and made some new friends including a guy named Ryan. He is cute and short and has an earring. But he is nice and I had to sit in his lap for a game thing we did. But he is sweet and that was good. There are some really fine guys at Largo. I saw where my classes would be. Mari and I walked around the school. Largo isn’t that big and it is neat. You can eat in the courtyard. On Tuesday I had practice. My coach wasn’t there, but the male helper person wa. He is cute. I’ll go into detail tomorrow about the rest of the week and swimming.
Right now I’m upset at Mommy and Daddy is mad at me. My life is a mess and a disappointment. I wish I could run away.
In honor of the holidays, here’s an extra long entry in which I detail a slow dance with a boy, Forrest Gump, and how much I love middle school. Merry Christmas!
Saturday, June 3rd, 1995
Before I go into school and the dance and my weekend. I’d like to share something- a phrase: “Your destiny is determined by your future. Our future beholds an unknown life.” As I was cleaning my room I came upon some seashells I could not bear to throw away. As I studied them I realized that each seashell is different. It tells a unique story. It has traveled from a different place. It’s mate or other half, lost at sea or in the sand. I got a letter from Valerie yesterday. I cannot believe we’re going to camp the same week. It’s been raining an awful lot. Yesterday in school the power went out for 2 1/2 hours. I left in 6th.
The 8th grade dance was last night. I didn’t go with anyone. But I did dance with someone. His name was Dwayne Carter. He and I are friends. I wanted to dance with him so I told Tiffany. She told him and then he told me he didn’t want to dance with me. Which was a lie. But as you can see we did dance. I don;t know what song, but I do know that he asked me dance. And we danced close. So close that if we were any closer it would look like we were having sex. His hands were warm and he had them just above my butt. He is my height so it made dancing easier. I rested my chin on his shoulder because that was the only place I could have it. I don’t think I really like him but I don’t know. I have mixed up feelings.
After the dance I spent the night at Jennifer’s house. I had fun. Her sister loves me as in she wouldn’t leave me alone. Jenn and I talked until 1 a.m. She taught me how to play pool and we read magazines. We also looked at yearbooks. We got ours Thursday, They’re cool. Jenn, Mom, and I saw Forrest Gump. It was so sad. I cried. I learned that Papa Dan, mom’s dad, fought in the Vietnam War. He is depressed about what happened.
I am babysitting Travis S. I am also watching the All Children’s Hospital telethon. Even though I am tired I want to write. I cannot wait until I have a family of my own and my own house and job. I don’t want to leave 8th grade. I’ll miss all my friends like Vanessa and Rebecca and Melissa. I’ll miss my teachers, my locker, my teachers, my homework, ans my middle school. I love my life.
WTF was up with that phrase I began my entry with? It makes no sense.
Also, this might be the funniest and honest diary entry I’ve ever written.